Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Hi, my name is Katherine, and I'm a dog person

Dear cats,

This food is my food. It is not for you. Please stop trying to be sneaky and eat it. Purring at me and acting friendly will also get you nowhere. I don't feed dogs my food (unless I drop it on the floor), and I certainly won't be giving it to you.

Also, my bedroom is off limits while I am asleep. Please stop trying to get in. I've never cuddled with a dog in my bed. I don't want you in here, either. When I actually have a dog of my own, I will also not be letting it sleep in my room because I am cold and heartless like my sleep relatively uninterrupted.

Also also, you are creepy. I am just minding my own business, and I turn around and there you are!! Please stop sneaking up on me.

I know I have to live with you for the next year, but if you could try to be a little less cat-like, I could try to like you a little more.


P.S. And stop eyeing Claude! It is my snake, I love it, and you are not allowed to play with or eat it!

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